Sometimes You Have to…Just Keep Going.

We don’t always understand why we’re going through this pain. It isn’t fair. It isn’t fair. We can repeat that over and over again and it’s true – it’s not fair that we have to endure so much suffering.

There’s no answer. That’s it. Sometimes we’re in the midst of a really heartbreaking time and there’s no short cut. And it takes so much courage just to keep paddling.

Look, some things don’t get better. Some people won’t ever change. Look around at the world: Sometimes there’s no chance at peace even though war is so terrible. You could make a long list of places where there is only hopelessness and despair.

Some things just are and we have to deal with them.

Some heartaches can never be healed; they must only be endured. The only comfort is knowing that down the road, we’ll be able to use this pain and the knowledge that we survived it to give comfort to someone else. Down the road, someone is going to come to us with the very same problem and we’ll be able to say, ah, yes, I was there. I know what it feels like.

Today, all we can do is put the kettle on the stove, make ourselves another cup of tea, go for a walk, try to find a scent of spring in the air, listen to a lonely bird’s song, watch a worm try to inch its way around a puddle. Sometimes the sky is so spectacularly blue that it overwhelms us. We think there should not be beauty when we feel so lost and alone.

To try to make this a part of our best chapter we have to look for one thing, something anything, to fill our hearts, to nudge aside a tiny bit of our hurt.

I will do one thing that is not what I usually do when I’m in pain…Just one thing to break my routine. Maybe just that will be a sign that I’m still alive.

About dianabletter

Diana Bletter is the author of several books, including The Invisible Thread: A Portrait of Jewish American Women (with photographs by Lori Grinker), shortlisted for a National Jewish Book Award. Her novel, A Remarkable Kindness, (HarperCollins) was published in 2015. She is the First Prize Winner of Moment Magazine's 2019 Fiction Contest. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, Commentary, tabletmag, Glamour, The Forward, The North American Review, Times of Israel, and is a reporter for Israel21C, and many other publications. She is author of Big Up Yourself: It's About Time You Like Being You and The Mom Who Took off On Her Motorcycle, a memoir of her 10,000-mile motorcycle trip to Alaska and back to New York. She lives in a small beach village in Western Galilee, Israel, with her husband and family. She is a member of the local hevra kadisha, the burial circle, and a Muslim-Jewish-Christian-Druze women's group in the nearby town of Akko. And, she likes snowboarding and climbing trees.
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4 Responses to Sometimes You Have to…Just Keep Going.

  1. One step at a time, one day at a time. Sometimes it is all we can do to just keep breathing and moving. Thanks for the connection to “A Week long Heartbreak,” Diana. It’s beautifully shared.

  2. Diana, this is so true. I will never understand why my son developed schizophrenia and has had such a difficult, painful life – but I am now much more empathetic to the plight of others with a mental illness. Everything happens for a higher purpose, even our painful times.

    • dianabletter says:

      Hi Marilyn, Thank you for sharing about your son’s illness. I am sure that you have gained strength, hope and experience that you can use to help others dealing with a similar situation. Heightened sensitivity and awareness are also gifts that only come from heartbreak. I appreciate your writing.

  3. You need to be a part of a contest for one of the best blogs on the web.

    I’m going to highly recommend this blog!

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