Tool For Tuesday: How To Make Decisions

In 2010, I wrote a blog about making decisions when one of my daughters was trying to figure out what to do with her life. (We all seem to ponder that question rather frequently.) I suggested that act like a cave-woman. Gather information the way that cave-dwellers gathered berries. Be a forager. Research. Ask questions. Take notes like a reporter. Then wait.

But here is more to think about. When it comes to making decisions, are you a presto or a procrastinator? Do you make immediate, instant decisions, or are you afraid your decisions won’t be perfect so you procrastinate?

I confess I’m a presto decision-maker. I err on the side of making an instant decision and then rue about it. I know I need to s-l-o-o-o-w way down. I’ve learned it’s best not to make decisions in the midst of a crisis and to wait. (I’m never good with that.)

People who procrastinate about decisions often enter into paralysis. Not good, either. There are few decisions that are life-threatening. Sometimes, we’re so busy thinking, “Should I move to Alaska? Should I marry Oscar Shlumperdink? Should I have a child?” For those huge life-changing decisions, we always get our answers when the time is right. We don’t have to force the issue. We can just keep living as best as we can today and the answer comes to us really naturally. Intuitively.

It’s more important how we make a decision than what decision we make. Here are six things we can do before making decisions.

Check our motives. Are they for our highest good?

Ask questions.

Gather information.

Write down the pro’s and con’s.

Speak to a trusted friend.

Pray. Then sleep on it. If the answer did not come to you clearly, then you might want to wait a day or two. If you are still waffling, wavering and wondering, then act like the hero of your own life. Do something. Sometimes we need to act less like our usual selves to become more ourselves. Positive acts build self-esteem.

And then, make the decision and then let go of the outcome. We are only responsible for the effort. We can only do the best we can do at the time.

Tool For Tuesday: Make a decision and then trust that the universe will support your dreams. Expect a miracle.

Here is a great blog post on decisions and making the right choice.

And, as always, this is from Malcolm Gladwell.


About dianabletter

Diana Bletter is the author of several books, including The Invisible Thread: A Portrait of Jewish American Women (with photographs by Lori Grinker), shortlisted for a National Jewish Book Award. Her novel, A Remarkable Kindness, (HarperCollins) was published in 2015. She is the First Prize Winner of Moment Magazine's 2019 Fiction Contest. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, Commentary, tabletmag, Glamour, The Forward, The North American Review, Times of Israel, and is a reporter for Israel21C, and many other publications. She is author of Big Up Yourself: It's About Time You Like Being You and The Mom Who Took off On Her Motorcycle, a memoir of her 10,000-mile motorcycle trip to Alaska and back to New York. She lives in a small beach village in Western Galilee, Israel, with her husband and family. She is a member of the local hevra kadisha, the burial circle, and a Muslim-Jewish-Christian-Druze women's group in the nearby town of Akko. And, she likes snowboarding and climbing trees.
This entry was posted in Be Less You To Be More You, Being a Hero In Your Life, miracles, Tool For Tuesday and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Tool For Tuesday: How To Make Decisions

  1. Food for thought. Marvelous advice. 🙂

  2. I’ve always been more of a Presto than a Procrastinator, and it hasn’t always been the best approach. The six steps are very valid, Diana.

  3. Great points as always, Diana. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s